Sunday, October 29, 2017

I’ll Be (Nothing)

I’ll be nothing, that’s what I’ll be.
I’ll be the limbs breaking on the ice,
I’ll be desire melting onto itself,
I’ll be the longing that possesses me
That I’ll never possess.

I’ll be nothing, that’s what I’ll be.
I’ll be the vicious hope that rides me to death,
I’ll be just another breath, another step
To nowhere...

(originally posted on December 06, 2004)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Delightful,

(hehe)

Its inner music is strongly there, the first part is especially powerful. Your imagery of limbs breaking on the ice is original and crude in a good way. The last two images in the first part are not as powerful, but they are original nevertheless, and their music is even better studied than that of the first imagery.

"Another step to nowhere" is weak; it abruptly breaks the music, has none of its own, and adds nothing new to my faculties. The two lines before it, though less powerful than the first part, are pleasantly real and sicere. The idea of desire riding you to death is classical and desperately emotional, like a sweeping wave,
Ton frère Ahmad